A peace of mind

 

Subject: A peace of mind.

If one takes the view that nothing has permanence, that our lives are 'impermanent', that everything is fleeting and of little consequence, that my actions are always sullied by their narcissistic intentions, then it frees me from the weight of not only seeking to do good but also the weight of having to do anything at all.  If freed from the western ideal of making every moment count, from birth to death, then being slothful has its attractions not only because doing nothing only has consequence that you yourself have to come to terms with and you at last,  reach the moment of yourself being totally in charge and that your actions hurt no one.
Inaction has few if any downside. The status quo is maintained and your inaction marks you as someone to be relied on, someone to trust through your ability not to make a difference.
Down to the smallest detail, not engaging has the benefit that you will be tolerated for your opaqueness, your lack of relevance, like the old person you have become  giving others the ability to look through you as being irrelevant to their needs.

 No familiar groups gossiping the day away at the cafe or on the street corner in some sun drenched cobbled courtyard. No hand held changing of the guard, a passing of the key to unlock the experience of the previous 80 years, only the ubiquitous farewell 'watch' ceremony when the desk is cleared out to make way for the new.

Escaping the clutches of responsibility, usually the responsibility other would have us hold we see not a clock ticking full of things to do but a clock which looses its relevance.
Time stands still, the format for the day is held in a series of needs, the washing and feeding, reading and the writing, the watching and the reflection but most of all the inner peace of knowing that non of this matters any more.