What is bulling

 

 

Subject: What is bullying

 

What is a bully and how do we define what bulling is. If as a boss I speak harshly towards a work colleague because they have failed to carry out what they had been asked to do, is that bullying. And the word harshly, what does that mean. If I swear at the person that is out of order in the white collar world but on a building site or in a factory, fruity language is much more in use to express frustration.
In days gone by, horror of horror men would take their disagreement outside and settle it with a punch or two and interestingly the outcome was often more amicable than the slow burn of resentment which characterises today's touchy feely method of dealing with conflict
Of course if a person sets out to use their power or physical presence, to threaten or impose fear over an individual then that is bullying which must be opposed but an argument, resulting in a shouting match is not bullying but rather simply an expression of frustration which we all experience from time to time. There are people who do not pull their weight and some who even go out of their way to oppose what a boss needs doing and in such a situation the boss has to win otherwise you have ineffectual responsibility, or worse, outright anarchy.
It was interesting listening to Dominic Raab the Secretary of State for Justice relate how he felt he hadn’t received justice in the complaints made against him by Senior Civil Servants in their dealings with him. Language is a balm or can be a weapon and in his resignation interview given to GBNEWS his calm reasoning I’m sure won many viewers over. “Butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth” best sums it up and one is thrown back on one’s instincts towards any confrontation these days, that the ‘Woke’ community have won, hands down with a swing towards a more feminist agenda in virtually all aspects of communication. The air-waves are awash with claims of male bulling and in the worst cases of assault and even rape. The use of the phrase ‘institutional misogyny’ has cloaked the police in an image which will affect, not only the way they do their job but in the way they recruit. Interview after interview seems to reveal women in fear of their lives as they walk on the street, young girls ignored by the authorities when they complain of harassment or worse, insufficient support in all matter of activities, a veritable floodgate of discontent burbles out revealing just how crass men are towards the female gender. It’s a wave of discontent which ignores the fact that there are often two sides to a story.
Dominic Raab in his story line seems so plausible that it’s only when the other side of the story is told and one is left having to make up one’s mind in who to believe, so it is in the gender war which is destroying our sense of balance between the sexes.
90% of men and 90% of women find sensible  ways of negotiating a way through what is a difficult route of often conflicting priorities. Men these days are quite rightly made to understand their wider role in the running of the house or their role in caring for the kids. In the past men after work congregated with their mates in the pub swopping banter, which incidentally is what the girls do until they have a child.  
The media from which many of our opinions are formed has itself undergone a sea change under the weight of seeking equality and the female is in the ascendency in most areas of public discourse. This can be a good thing but it disguises the fundamental difference between the way the genders think and behave. Women are still far more child orientated. Women to this end of capturing a mate still decorate their image with deep routed sexual displays of attraction for the males benefit. From high heeled shoes to short revealing skirts and an excessive showing of once private areas of their body is now a days almost de rigueur whilst for the most part, men haven’t changed other than discarding the tie. This in itself is an example of the almost fraudulent claim that we are the same and cut from the same cloth. There is something in the mental approach which determines our fundamental difference.
Viva la difference was the old cry but today as yesterday, wanting to display brings with it the disadvantage that having attracted the male spider what do you do (the spider simply eats him) since putting the situation back in the proverbial box is easier said than done, irrespective of what cold jurisprudence dictates.