Apathy / Empathy

Its not apathy, its not indifference, but given the choice of sitting at home with an onion sandwich and a hot mug of tea or, venturing out to a party with a load of semi strangers.  The onion sandwich wins out every time.
After the onion, any mixing is out of the question anyway !!

Where does this, "can't be bothered" attitude come from all of a sudden. I am naturally gregarious. Talking to strangers has never been a problem, probably an ability crafted when I wandered in various countries alone for months if not years.
Looking out of the window its a beautiful day, there's a pub not far away that sells independently brewed beer from the barrel. On a day like this they often have a barbecue and sometimes a jazz band. The people are an intelligent, successful, mature lot, the conversation flows around every subject under the sun, so why aren't I there with them ?
Well on the one hand Marie doesn't want to go and and it isn't an easy choice to go alone, there is usually a whiff of resentment if I do go.  Strange as you may think the psychological equivalent of a thick skin is not an attribute I would claim to have (although some of you would contest this).

Being in ones own surroundings is "a cop out", since no effort is required, nothing to conjure up, or appear to be what ever the group your with, require of you. You run to the beat of your own agenda which might be just simply, to do nothing !! 
Of course I have my blog to keep me company, to offload my empathy. My thoughts can be captured, my emotions set out in the hope that someone out there is listening and hopefully, marginally, interested  ?????